I am sure you know the phrase, “If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!”
Lately I have been going through a hard time being “happy”. There has been so much that has changed in my life over the past two years. I am still having a really hard time coming to terms with the fact that I am going to be an Army wife for the foreseeable future. Not because of the Army, but because it means I am not coming home to my family and friends anytime soon. I am also having a hard time watching Charlotte grow up so fast! I looked back at my personal Instagram the other night and could not believe how much she has grown and changed. She doesn’t look like a baby at all anymore. I wish I could freeze time or travel back to when she was so small and needed me all the time. I am also struggling with the fact that it may still be a while before I go back to work. I enjoy being a stay at home mom and the freedom it gives me to Blog and run Sixth and Vine boutique with Kayla. But I still long for the day that I will go back to work and bring home a decent sized paycheck and be able to contribute to our family in that way as well.
Since I have been back home in the Midwest, I have been the happiest I’ve been in a long time. However, I did have a break down last week and realized that I have to get my life together. I do not have the time or energy to devote to negativity anymore, it is/was consuming my life. I was missing so many wonderful moments with Charlotte by feeling sorry for myself because I wasn’t getting what I want right now out of life. So, for what it’s worth, I decided to add a few time routines to my life that I hope will make “mama” a more positive and happy lady again!
Getting ready for the day. I have a really bad habit of not getting up, putting on my face and getting dressed if I have no plans for the day. Partially because I don’t like to waste makeup if I don’t have to. Secondly, because I don’t like to sit around the house in jeans and a nice shirt. I love comfy clothes. But the downside of not being dressed and ready is when one of my friends ask me to randomly do something. I always say no because I haven’t showered yet.(insert see no evil emoji) The other downside to wearing comfy clothes too much? Weight gain. Every time I go to put on my size 8 jeans and they are tighter than the last time, I have a melt down. Which leads me to my next point.
Exercise. I do not know how many times I need to tell myself or have been told by my husband, mother and friends that I am too stationary. I am not nearly as active as I was before I had Char. When I worked at the car dealership at least I was up walking around most of the time unless I was working in the accounting department. I need to do some yoga and weight lifting for myself. I miss the way I felt and looked when I was more active. Over the weekend, I attended a charity Yoga work out with one of my best friends and it was amazing! I am hoping to start a new trend now that I have the ball rolling.
Water. MUST DRINK MORE WATER! I have never been a good water drinker which is probably the reason I feel so sickly and tired all the time. Adding lemon and cucumber to my water makes it so much easier for me to get a little closer to the amount I should be consuming in a day. Maybe a few more cute tumblers and fun straws will help as well. I have had my eye on the new colorful ones from Starbucks.
Sleep. I have a terrible sleep schedule. When Char was smaller and before I started this blog, I would ALWAYS take a nap with her. We co-slept together during every morning and afternoon nap. Well, that changed when she got older and now she only sleeps well in her own room with the blinds pulled and the sound machine playing rain sounds. I now spend her naps working on editing photos, writing blogs, designing other blogs, working on Sixth and Vine, or contacting companies for collaborations. The same goes for when she falls asleep at night. As soon as she is down, I am right on my computer and I stay there until 12-1 some nights. The sad thing is John’s sleep schedule is even worse. He gets up at least two hours before me and goes to bed at the same time, if not later. We BOTH need to make a better schedule so we have more time to sleep.
One on One Time. John and I have a hard time spending any real one on one time together. He leaves for work at 5 and doesn’t return home until 5 most days. By that time I am starting dinner, feeding the dogs, and still chasing my busy toddler around. I feel like our life is always chaos. Once dinner, bath, and reading time is over and Char is fast asleep, he plays games on his phone or watches TV while I work. There was a night not long before I made the trip home that we decided everything else could wait – my blogging, our TV shows, Candy Crush…it could just wait. We both poured ourselves a drink, and sat out in the back yard by the fire and just talked. We talked like we used to before life changed so much. It was amazing how good it felt to not be watching TV or looking at my Instagram and instead just spent time with my best friend. We need more nights like that together.
Blog more. I really enjoy blogging. I love everything about it. Everything from taking the photos/editing, working with brands I already love, learning about web design, and connecting with my readers and fellow bloggers. It bring me so much joy. I have also decided to stop worrying about becoming a huge success overnight. I love the place I am at now with blogging and if I stayed here forever I wouldn’t mind one bit. Sure, I would like to be more successful, but I have realized that nothing is worth stressing and crying over. If it is meant to be it will be. If you work hard at something you are bound to do well eventually.
Meditate. I need to take time out of my days to clear my head and just breathe. I let myself get so bent out of shape over the most insignificant things.
All of these steps are obviously much easier said than done. I plan on giving all of them a real shot. It is not fair to my family and friends to have to deal with the mess I have been lately.I have to learn that everything will work itself out and to just go with the flow sometimes. No matter where we end up, I will have my handsome husband, beautiful daughter and silly dogs. So hopefully, the Mama phrase works the same way in reverse… “If Mama’s happy, everyone is happy”
Mari says
Love your blog Whitney. I can totally relate to not bring as active before having kids and trying to find us time with the hubby. It’s really hard when you work and have children.
Whitney says
Hi Mari, Thank you! It is a completely different life being married and having children!
Amanda says
Whitney!
I love reading your blogs I can relate to a lot of them! Your an amazing mother and wife! Being a mom gets easier over time. It was hard for me being a single parent with karlee but over time I’ve learned you can’t stress over the small stuff. Just enjoy every minute you have have with char! They grow up so fast but she will always need her mommy!